A look at “Narcissistic traits as mediators in the relationship between parenting styles and nonconsensual nonmonogamy in university students” by Suany Pineda-Sandoval, Cesia Bustillo-Núñez, Hanny Gómez, Jennifer Chevez, Yeyson Sosa, Marta Kowal and Miguel Landa-Blanco (2026)
We’ve spent a lot of this series on consensual non-monogamy, where everyone knows and agrees. This study looks at its very different cousin: non-consensual non-monogamy, better known as cheating. It’s an important distinction. Polyamory and open relationships are built on honesty, whereas infidelity breaks an agreement. This study from Honduras asks whether the way we were parented, and our personality traits, help explain who strays.
What they found
The researchers surveyed 399 university students in Honduras about their memories of how their parents treated them (warm, rejecting or overprotective), their levels of grandiose narcissistic traits, and their infidelity-related behaviours and desires.
The headlines:
- Infidelity was common, especially among men. 45% of men said they’d been emotionally or romantically involved with someone other than their partner, compared with 26% of women. For sexual infidelity, the figures were 15% and 5%.
- For women, none of the parenting or personality factors predicted infidelity.
- For men, the picture was more complex. Remembering warm parents was linked with less infidelity directly. But it was also linked with higher narcissistic traits, which were in turn linked with more infidelity. In other words, warmth seemed protective, unless it came packaged with a sense of grandiosity.
- For men, feeling rejected by parents was linked with more infidelity.
The authors suggest that different pathways may be at work for men and women, and call for longitudinal research to untangle them.
A grain of glitter ✨
The study adds valuable data from Central America, which is underrepresented in relationship research. But the findings are modest, and the authors are refreshingly frank about the limitations.
The whole model explained only about 12% of the differences in infidelity, so most of what drives cheating lies elsewhere. Participants were students who volunteered, and they were recalling their childhoods, which memory can colour. The infidelity measure included desires and behaviours without checking whether they actually broke an agreement. Only grandiose narcissism was measured, not its more vulnerable forms. And because it’s a snapshot, we can’t say parenting caused any of it. The study doesn’t appear to explore sexual orientation, so it’s unclear how far the findings apply to queer relationships.
Why this matters
If infidelity has touched your relationship, whether you strayed or were hurt, it can bring up shame, anger and confusion about why it happened. This study is a reminder that our early relationships and personality can play a part, but they aren’t destiny. Therapy can be a space to understand these patterns without blame, and to decide what honesty and commitment mean to you.
Consent is the difference between a herd and a heartbreak. Whatever your paddock looks like, make sure everyone knows the rules.