Rehearsing conversations before you have them. Copying other people’s facial expressions. Forcing eye contact. Suppressing the urge to move, fidget or stim. Going home and collapsing. If this sounds familiar, you may know all about masking, also called camouflaging: hiding or compensating for neurodivergent traits in order to fit in.
What the research says
In 2017, Laura Hull and colleagues interviewed 92 autistic adults about their experiences of camouflaging. Participants described a wide range of strategies, from scripting and mimicry to carefully studying social rules. Their reasons included wanting to make friends, getting a job, and avoiding bullying or rejection. But the costs were striking: exhaustion, anxiety, and a sense of losing touch with who they really were. The paper’s title quotes one participant: “Putting on my best normal”.
Other research has linked camouflaging with poorer mental health. A 2018 study by Sarah Cassidy and colleagues found that camouflaging was associated with an increased risk of suicidal thoughts and behaviours in autistic adults.
Long-term masking may also contribute to autistic burnout. In a 2020 study co-designed with autistic researchers, Dora Raymaker and colleagues described burnout as chronic exhaustion, loss of skills and reduced tolerance to stimulation, caused by life stressors that outstrip a person’s capacity to cope, without adequate support.
Masking isn’t unique to autism. Many people with ADHD describe masking too, and LGBTQIA+ people know a great deal about hiding parts of themselves to stay safe.
A grain of glitter ✨
Much of this research is qualitative or cross-sectional, so it captures experiences and associations rather than proving that masking causes poor mental health. Measuring camouflaging is tricky: it’s partly about intention, which is hard to see from the outside. And masking isn’t always a bad thing. Sometimes it’s a sensible, short-term safety strategy. The aim isn’t to shame anyone for masking, but to make sure it’s a choice rather than a permanent necessity.
What you can do
- Notice when and where you mask. Which settings feel safe enough to unmask, even a little?
- Build in recovery time. After intense social situations, plan for rest.
- Find spaces where you don’t have to perform. Neurodivergent communities can be a huge relief.
- Seek affirming support. Therapy should help you mask less, not more (see “Diagnosed at Last”).
A unicorn wearing a horse costume all day will get very hot under the collar. Take it off when you can.
Further reading
- Hull, L. et al. (2017). “Putting on my best normal”: social camouflaging in adults with autism spectrum conditions. Journal of Autism and Developmental Disorders
- Cassidy, S. et al. (2018). Risk markers for suicidality in autistic adults. Molecular Autism
- Raymaker, D. M. et al. (2020). Defining autistic burnout. Autism in Adulthood
If you’re having thoughts of suicide, you can call Samaritans free, any time, on 116 123.